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Personal Essay | Stars

By Lisa Baldwin

Last Edited 11/5/2024

 

Rippling waves lap against the boat, threatening to creep and splash on the deck. The algae has not been scraped off the deck and if it gets wet you’ll slip. There is always something that threatens the safety of the boat. A storm? A tsunami? A mythical serpent or giant squid? You feel you’ve seen them all, and yet there’s always something new, something you hadn’t considered would be a problem. And yet you look back on your life and somehow all the puzzle pieces fit.

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            You are alone, this boat serves only one. People say this is good, that is how it is meant to be. When the storms come and blacken the sky you are not allowed to call out for help, your SOS signals go unanswered. You are alone when the freezing waters hit your face as the waves attempt to consume you. When flashes of lighting hit your sails you will be patching them alone. Shoveling water out with a near broken wooden bucket alone. Waiting for the last bits of water to dry from the baking morning sun alone. You pull out the splinters from your hands alone. You will read letters from people who claim they love you alone, and you will set them out to dry.

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            Of course, I will be there for you. Of course, you are important. Of course, I love you. You will not believe them, even as you watch the glittering waters that surround you. Was any of what happened real? Was there really a storm? A kraken? A tsunami? Have those really happened to you? It feels embarrassing, not knowing how to trust, especially those you adore, the people you genuinely want the best for. But they keep sending you letters, what else is there than to believe what someone has said hundreds of times to you?

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            But someday you will learn how to make friends with the ocean. It will take you to see those people you love. Show you places full of comfort, places of magic, places of history and beauty. On very still nights, when the wind has stilled and the clouds have cleared, the skies will reflect back on the ocean and the world will be made of stars.

About the Author

Lisa Baldwin is an aspiring editor pursuing a B.F.A in Writing with a minor in creative writing. She is currently the Vice President of the Writer's Club at her College, Savannah College of Art and Design. She hopes to dive into the publishing industry after graduating.

Copyright 2024                      Geometric Charmer

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